they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
