The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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