There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
