people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize