I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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