I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize