Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
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