Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
