I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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