Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Can I color on your dick again?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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