My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
