Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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