I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
