I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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