susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
