on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
