Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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