and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
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They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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