She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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