More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize