Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
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