Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
