hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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