careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
