so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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