i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You pole danced in your parka.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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