Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I had to cum in my sink.
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