He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
operation have a gay friend backfired
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize