Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
