I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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