That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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