So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
