DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
