I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
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