Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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