90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
