How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
