My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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