also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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