So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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