p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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