I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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