I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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