nutella sex= disaster
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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