I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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