You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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