I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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