Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You dont lie about slip and slides
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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