You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
