Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
