I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
