I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
